Scooter Gone Wild
28 JanTaxi!!!
24 JanI’ve been away since Saturday and haven’t had a moment to park myself and hit the keys! Prior to starting my blog my girlfriends said that I must “republish” some of my old material. Thank goodness for Yahoo! mail as you can easily search through old mail – boy oh boy, did I find some doozies! So for the next few days I will provide you with a few “blasts from the past”.
“It is pouring rain in Halifax, but who can complain given the weather we’ve had in recent months! Not sure what all of you have been up to in recent days – but I hope you are all happy and healthy. I have a few funny stories to tell you:
I went on an on-line date a few weeks back… he was French and was quite cute in his pictures (and in person actually). In one of his emails he said to me “Do you take your dog to work with you? If so, I think we have met before.” Me and my ninja memory – I couldn’t think of where I had met him which is quite odd. I replied and said “Oh really, where???” he replied “I will tell you on Tuesday – meet me at Bistro de Cocque at 8pm”. The day came and I wasn’t feeling like going… but I did. It was pouring rain outside and when I got to the restaurant the floor was SUPER slippery. The waitress said to me “Oh I think the person you are meeting is in the dining room around the corner – be really careful as the floor was just polished”. I very carefully made my way there and right as I approached the table – yup I went tits up! I fell right in front of him! I got my arse and my ego up off the floor very quickly and awkwardly said hello. After we ordered some wine I asked him “So, where I have met you??” He said “I drive a cab and I’ve driven you a few times!” I then recalled meeting him – but as the taxi protocol goes I was in the back seat and didn’t really see his face. So already I have fallen on my ass and now I find out my date was my cab driver before. Not sure if it was the fact that I fell, that he put his gum on the side of his plate while he ate or that he was so deeply insecure about being a cab driver (explained over and over why/how much he works/owns a house) or what…but it wasn’t there for me. Now every time I dial 425-6666 I am fearful of the French Frog being my driver.
That about sums up my online dating experience – awkward and underwhelming.
Thank goodness for friends who set you up 😉
EC
An Italian in the making…
15 JanI’ve been taking Italian cooking lessons for about 1.5 years at the Italian Culture Centre in Halifax. Although I do not have Italian heritage I’ve been asked by many creepy men if I am Italian; I guess my dark eyes and hair lead them to believe that I came from “The Boot”. Although my blood isn’t so my taste buds are certainly Italian by nature. My class is composed of a strange mix of people: Pierre, the insanely pervy retired navy guy who now rescues cats. Jerry who attends with his wife Sandy – Jerry follows along with Pierre’s pervy comments until his wife gives him a snake eye. He is like one of Pierre’s cats just dying to get out of the cage. Janet and Trevor: she has the most nasally voice I have ever heard, but I can’t say anything about them because they are quite fabulous. Dumb blond and husband (I can’t recall their names), this woman asks some of the most idiotic questions you have ever heard and it makes me wonder how in the hell she got through life and how she scooped such a nice husband. “Franco, where do bread crumbs come from?” This year my boyfriend Maurice comes with me, so Pierre edits his “pussy” comments for when he his talking about the feline sort. Oh and John, he is awesome. Anyhow….
We’ve made some absolutely outstanding food! Prior to this I shied away from lamb (the imagery of a little lamb steered me away from buying it), veal and other meats. Franco and Bruno jump from English to Italian, he spills everything and she cleans it up and they guesstimate most of the ingredients as they toss them into the bowl. As Franco cooks he sporadically tastes his dishes, once the goods are in his mouth he pauses and if it is good his eyebrows go up, if it needs something salt/pepper or garlic are usually added. One of last nights dishes knocked my socks off! Lemon Pasta. I actually asked for seconds which I have not before – we do at least 3 courses so I usually preserve stomach space for the next. For more of this dish I was willing to feel like I would vomit from being so full.
Here is something similar as they don’t give us the recipes until the week after we cook them (not sure on the strategy there)
http://www.lidiasitaly.com/recipes/detail/965
There is a fair amount of cream in this recipe so it isn’t one you will be making all the time. Well, you will be tempted to make it all the time but that will result in the purchase of bigger pants and a double chin.
Enjoy!
EC
All Shook Up
14 JanSo, this is my first post! A few months back the World Champion Elvis impersonator contacted me in regards to doing some fundraising for the organization I work for. The show was on Saturday night… now my Dad is an Elvis lover so I am proud to say that I know the words to many of his songs. Off I went to see The King – I was pleasantly surprised to see (to me) that he looked remarkably like the Real McCoy. What I found more shocking were the people who attended this show. I am not sure what cave they climbed out of. It seemed like prior to coming to the show most people sat in a locked closet while smoking a pack of cigarettes and cooking fish. Every person who walked by me seemed to be carrying intense smells with them. After cementing themselves with bad odors they went to their bathroom and sprayed cologne/perfume they bought when Elvis was alive or sprayed their hair with products which give a “globe head” or secured their comb over. Much of the concert was blocked by a women who had a head of hair similar to a round metal dish cleaner I use. The man behind us had on some kind of cologne which made us wonder if he was back from the dead and the formaldehyde he was soaking in was still on him. Now, it seems as if Elvis must have given out scarves to his female admirers when he sang the song “Love Me Tender” because when this ELVIS IMPERSONATOR sang the song women rushed to the stage with their hands in the air looking for him to give them a scarf. Now, I wouldn’t even run to the stage for the real guy, so you can bloody well guarantee a sweaty guy from Moncton in a one piece jumpsuit handing out scarfs from the dollar store wasn’t getting me out of my seat. Later on in the show he gave out teddy bears while singing the hit song “Teddy Bear”. Again, the same women rushed the stage as if they were running from the bulls in Madrid. I felt awkward and itchy as I watched this whole thing roll out. I am not sure if before I arrived at the show there was a crane placing people into seats because when the lights came on there were many who couldn’t move – not sure how they were getting out.
That’s it. Until next time…
EC